Lots of traffic this weekend in the motorhome, including an afternoon where I left the rig to the devices of my companero’s as I wobbled around the lot making the Mayors’ rounds, rig to rig collecting “votes” and giving away booze in anticipation of next seasons electoral cycle.
I paid the price, in spades.
Someone (while I was out)……no, not some”one”………someTHING, some sort of bestial fiend…something with no emotion, no sense of humanity whatsoever took advantage of my generosity and rifled through my war-chest cupboards until they found what they were looking for, snatched it and scuttled into the night victorious.
What glorious bounty was stolen you ask, what precious payload went missing in skullduggerous scheme? I hazard a guess that you may already know: yes you; you with the cookies.
Why in hell would anyone steal delicous, golden Oreo’s from a man who has the cookie monster tattooed on his arm, placed strategically near a heart featuring a banner spelling the word: Cookies. Most people use that banner to write “MOM” or “POPS”. I wrote Cookies. I love Cookies. I am a Cookie, and those cookies are my favorite.
I will never forget this.
Golden Oreos are best served dipped in french roast and those hadnt even been opened yet because I didnt want to share with anyone….I wanted to feast upon their golden flesh in private, away from greedy hands and lustful eyes……removing all danger of having to “share”.
Enjoy the spoils of your ill fated deed you godless punk. Those tasty bastards were double stuffed!
(damnit).