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Problems

Henchbot — Wed, 19 May 2010 16:08:47 +0000

I went to Starbucks again today. This time she bought my coffee, we talked about unrest in Thailand for fucks sake. I used to never go to Starbucks but now I’m there every day and Im on Facebook every day, Im even applying a CAPS to Facebook!!!
Things are going downhill fast.
Im not supposed to like Starbucks. Using phrases like “my barista” just sickens me. Whats next: McDonalds and techno music, vounteering at Homeless Shelters and hot air ballooning? Greys Anatomy!!! AAHHHGGHH!

I need an intervention, this is my call for help.
Henchmen unite.
If it matters: I only drink a shot in the dark, an off menu beverage that is simply served as a short drip with a shot of espresso (add a few cubes so I dont have to wait for it to cool down, and every other day i pick up the NY Times).
This clip below used to make me snicker, now Im just scared to death.

Facebook Stalker (original version) – watch more funny videos

ScienceLab! breaking Squid news:

Henchbot — Fri, 14 May 2010 18:02:21 +0000

Finally something that DIDNT happen in Enumclaw Washington.
This is what happens when you ask for a new ScienceLab! you filthy Squidlets.

Served over Ice:

Henchbot — Fri, 23 Apr 2010 20:59:42 +0000

Welcome aboard: bring me vodka so I can function and possibly fire this thing back up. Return to broadcast is imminent.

The Wolf

Henchbot — Sat, 10 Apr 2010 04:09:09 +0000

Dirtbag Ball

Henchbot — Tue, 30 Mar 2010 04:46:12 +0000

The Rendezvous landed on the greatest weekend of all time for ski-bums in the PACNW: the Dirtbag Ball at Crystal Mountain. If you dont know what it is, it doesnt matter….its easy to explain: Ski Patrol sells tickets to a huge rager in a private lodge and tells everyone to dress up and go nuts, which we did; sometime in the middle of the party they crown a King and Queen as Dirtballs for the year. Dirtball being defined as the most hardcore ski bum on the hill for that particular year. Upon crowning they are awarded some gear, a hat and bragging rights for the season. Its one hell of a party, one of the best ones Ive seen in fact, we had a damn fine time consorting with the locals that night. Interesting to note: after last call I met the new Queen of the Mtn and she was telling me all sorts of stories, the most interesting one being her other award as Queen: free booze for the year. Im impressed of course. Covetous even.
I got shanghai’d by two dark eyed, raven haired gypsy sisters that night, I shoulda seen those two a mile away and maybe I did, and maybe that was the problem but thats what I get. They had me pegged the day before I think……..
The Dirtbag Ball is big time, the real deal and by god we are going back next year for more. The only rule is you have to dress up, I was lucky I had the tree suit in my closet.
Here are 50-odd pics I took that night.
I tell you what, that place BLEW UP when the dj dropped this jam. Every time I hear this I will think of that night now.

Cookie thug

Henchbot — Tue, 16 Mar 2010 16:38:35 +0000

Lots of traffic this weekend in the motorhome, including an afternoon where I left the rig to the devices of my companero’s as I wobbled around the lot making the Mayors’ rounds, rig to rig collecting “votes” and giving away booze in anticipation of next seasons electoral cycle.
I paid the price, in spades.
Someone (while I was out)……no, not some”one”………someTHING, some sort of bestial fiend…something with no emotion, no sense of humanity whatsoever took advantage of my generosity and rifled through my war-chest cupboards until they found what they were looking for, snatched it and scuttled into the night victorious.
What glorious bounty was stolen you ask, what precious payload went missing in skullduggerous scheme? I hazard a guess that you may already know: yes you; you with the cookies.
Why in hell would anyone steal delicous, golden Oreo’s from a man who has the cookie monster tattooed on his arm, placed strategically near a heart featuring a banner spelling the word: Cookies. Most people use that banner to write “MOM” or “POPS”. I wrote Cookies. I love Cookies. I am a Cookie, and those cookies are my favorite.
I will never forget this.
Golden Oreos are best served dipped in french roast and those hadnt even been opened yet because I didnt want to share with anyone….I wanted to feast upon their golden flesh in private, away from greedy hands and lustful eyes……removing all danger of having to “share”.
Enjoy the spoils of your ill fated deed you godless punk. Those tasty bastards were double stuffed!
(damnit).

Whats for breakfast Pa?

Henchbot — Sat, 13 Feb 2010 16:22:38 +0000

BREAD, BOY!

(get the hell away from me)

yeah, i DID file that under food porn.

Doom

Henchbot — Tue, 02 Feb 2010 03:38:31 +0000

10 million gallons o’ raw sewage dumped into Elliott Bay

Henchbot — Thu, 17 Dec 2009 00:00:39 +0000

An estimated 10 million gallons of untreated wastewater was discharged into Elliott Bay on Monday night from the West Point Treatment Plant in Seattle’s Magnolia neighborhood.

FlickrDump

Henchbot — Wed, 09 Dec 2009 05:48:04 +0000

Ive been doing “local things” for a number of days now and short of riding those damn ducks all over town, I think Ive just about got the list of “stuff to do while your in town”whittled down to nothing. Being obsessed with frontier history/western cultural narratives I was only too happy to oblige a request to tour Seattle’s Underground “city” which was really nothing more than whorehouses and gambling parlours…general dens of iniquity and skullduggery. I saw a Whores Tub wherein she would replenish her tools of the trade, I touched a bedspring where not just one, but many a whore did their best work. The entire time I could hear Al Swearengen screaming at dopefiends for stealing his shipments, or see Doc scuttling across a shadowy gangway on his way to “tend to the snatch”. I recomend the trip, its $15 for an hour/half and well worth every cent, don’t forget to befriend the guide, whose name is Jim and lives here on the Westside.

Also went to the SciFi Musuem and documented that in its entirety, however brief that was. The musuem leaves much undone, but there are some gems tucked away in various displays.

Sunday night featured a cruise around the Sound with local cruising degenerates Argosy, of which there are no pics because said cruise circles the Bay repeatedly while serving vodka called Czar of the North or some such rot-gut varietal and before long, it all becomes irrelevant. Its NIGHTIME after all. Many a glass was lifted in cheery toast to present company regardless, and there was food so all was not lost.

On Flickr there are sets of all these things, and all worth a quick look. Here are the links and a few of my favorites:

cephalopods: SciFi Musuem

Cackling Whores: Seattle Underground

Doing what Men do: Ballard Locks