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Monday thoughts

Daniel — Mon, 09 May 2011 15:48:09 +0000

Yesterday was Mothers Day, a day of flowers and family dinners.
Yesterday I took my Grandma a huge Sockeye salmon fresh off of Kodiak AK, she totally loved it and for me, being such a grammas boy…I donno, made me really happy to see her so excited.
Later in the afternoon we all piled into the Caddy and went to a local buffet place. I hate buffets, hate them for what they are: human feed troughs. I admit part of the reason I bought the salmon was b/c I knew she would want to stay home and cook it instead even though I don’t lose it over salmon, its better than standing in line behind an obese family of 4 that is collectively going nuclear over chafers of gravy and eggs. My buffet tactic is simple: only one plate, one time and never more than I would normally eat…..not like the dude that always teeters around with a 5 foot pile on one plate, I keep it real and I keep it light.
Sometimes when I go through buffets, the serving utensil accidentally slips from my clutches and hits the floor, stopping the entire herd behind me from feeding until a new utensil is brought out by the hapless server who hates his job every Easter, Mothers Day and Christmas. The maneuver gives me the space I need to contain my humiliation at being in the trough.
Another great move in a buffet line is real time food commentary alongside random wheezing, this tactic is a must-have when the guy behind you starts crowding your back. Inspect things like meatballs, rolling them around the pan to approve them before either piling them into your feedbag or muttering something about not having enough gravy for you before shuffling on down the line. The whole time you’re pushing the meatball around the chafer, make sure you are comparing it to real life associations that it may or may not remind you of, swedish meatballs slathered in congealed gravy are great for this exercise because they look like so many things. Sometimes wheezing can backfire, watch out for fellow wheezers, real lifers who understand the wheeze to be some sort of social calling card, a brotherhood of sorts. They will tell you about last weeks’ deviled eggs being so much better than this weeks’.
What about the buffet rat who inevitably pockets the bacon? A dozen or so slices wedged into a greasy napkin that is surreptisously slipped into suit pocket or handbag? Just stare at them while you absently pile au gratin into your mouth. Another tactic would be the attempt to make them lose or otherwise dislodge the prize from their filthy, fat grips. Seeing the bacon napkin drop to the floor is like the slow-motion death of a gunslinger where the target goes down screaming NOOOOOO…..except it’s …you know, slowed way down.
I saw a kid lose his little stash napkin yesterday, poor guy. Bad habits are hard to break arent they? Sometimes it takes a hard life lesson to combat your puberty onset obesity.
People are inherently ruder when feeding at the carcass we call buffets. People have no problem waving down the server, fingering them with glittering, greedy eyes and chubby hands hoisted high as grease drips down the shirt sleeve. I hate that, yesterday it happened 4 times.
I saw the guy with the tuxedo t-shirt yesterday, what made it truly horrible was the flabby gut bouncing around his belt, unencumbered and uncovered by the shirt which was far too short. I kept an eye on him all afternoon, 6 trips he took, each plate piled high, each trip took a little longer the fuller he got, the slower he dragged.
Then you have your server, I get it: she has been flagged down all day, its harsh but the attitudes and the hard coffee pours were unacceptable to me. I knew I had only one choice and it was tough but she was a miserable feckless woman who hated her entire section, despite being one of them herself.
Our reservation was at 2pm, right after the main rush; by 3 pm our party of 7 was just getting warmed up and by 4pm the ordeal had ended, graze-wise at least. Server had been deteriorating fast, and when she almost burned gramma with a hard pour, I decided to change the game: I started in with the stories, yeah that’s right, WE CAMPED. We camped long and we camped hard, I talked about motorcycle trips, the ongoing buffalo problems in Montana, Chinese Honey took a REALLLLLLY LONG TIME for me to get through, explained in fascinating detail the joys and excitement of the new Crystal Mtn ski gondola, we discussed fly fishing the Wenatchee River and of course the grand finale (after the Alaska stories) was getting grandma to explain in depth her reasoning behind Dominoes, a game we all love.
We had one hell of a good time, and were the last table to leave. Mission Accomplished.
When we got home, I suggested next year we stay at home for an old tyme family dinner, an idea met with praise.
I.hate.buffets.

Speaking of Mission Accomplished, dont’cha just love this image:

The Captain

Daniel — Thu, 17 Mar 2011 02:36:45 +0000

Yer all doomed.

Mountain King

Daniel — Thu, 17 Feb 2011 16:22:19 +0000

Salivating wildly over an unimpeded 4 night/5 day Mayor’s traipse into the Mountains. Its been over 3 weeks since Ive been there, not counting last weekends’ 20 hour stealth trip.
My grandmother’s health is leveling out nicely, my job is finally easing up (been an incredibly busy couple of weeks) and my new Cave has come together quite nicely, its finally time to get away; I will see you all in the motorhome this weekend.
Set sail Friday mid-afternoon and drop anchor through Tuesday.
Come by for a beer you scallywags.

Ninja Motorhome Podcast

Daniel — Sun, 30 Jan 2011 16:10:04 +0000

Ive been thinking about a creating a relevant podcast since Summer of 2k10. It would be very easy to set up a studio in the motorhome, record a session every Saturday night during Winter, Sunday night polish and tailor with a few tracks that i listened to throughout the week and then publish every Monday.
I may give this a go in March just to see.
Would you listen to a podcast based out of the most social motorhome on the mountain, recorded on its busiest night? Comments are open for your feedback.

Ski Season

Daniel — Tue, 18 Jan 2011 23:39:36 +0000

The snow scene limps back to life this weekend, alot of us are headed up Thursday through Sunday, big fire planned for Saturday. Swing through and say hi, grab a free beer from the Mayor.

Friday Noise/Pics/Vid

Daniel — Sat, 15 Jan 2011 06:12:06 +0000

Das Racist is so baked, they need this remix and as usual Hood Internet makes everything better with their Midas Touch. Did anyone see HoodInternet last night @ Nectar?
Also classic pics from the weekend and a video nugget.
The Hood Internet – Go Hahahaha (Das Racist x Cults) by hoodinternet

Gone Shreddin’

Daniel — Tue, 11 Jan 2011 23:52:31 +0000

Back in a couple days with brand new Monday night bowling footy, shred footy and tons of new pics from the places we go.
Gonna be fun.
See you all on the other side.
My favorite part of the song above is of course: second 53.

Treehouse Tony NYE footy

Daniel — Wed, 05 Jan 2011 21:10:18 +0000

use headphones and listen for the guy screaming for mushrooms.

Back on Broadcast!

Daniel — Mon, 03 Jan 2011 05:00:23 +0000

Back into the City; a few weeks deep in the Mountains has done its work: Im fully charged and ready for the new year. Over 550 photos have yet to be processed, alot them will be discarded but there are a few gems waiting to be polished and published.
Here is a 12 pack teaser:

oh and then there is this: This beauty made my night, first thing I saw when I came home. Thank you again, internet.

Chairlift quotes:

Daniel — Tue, 21 Dec 2010 20:57:04 +0000

Nick Porter on what it means to drop anchor in the upper motorhome lot of Stevens Pass Ski Resort:

Daniel its not bad at all, if you dont mind a couple bulls like us running around your china shop.

Season has begun!
We rode mostly grooms all weekend and true to form, Tye Mill (frontside) was the best for hot laps and random freshies. We did play around the GunTower area and that was ok, the real surprise though was secret stash above the Lots. I nimbly dodged two serious creekholes that I didnt see until I was right on top of them but otherwise that area is totally ready, we had fun back there.
I didnt break out the NeverSummer yet, I want my sea legs back on fully before I strap into that beast. I did ride last years Custom X to its capacity though. Fresh wax and that thing screams down anything I point it towards, a totally sweet ride. I wiped out in the trees pretty bad below the gun shack this weekend but really I had no business being back there where the cliffs are. It is what it is, I rode out alive.
About the near legendary vodka tap: 3.5 gallons of vodka flowed through that thing in 3 days. I think the problem is obvious! At least in a bottle you can measure your cosumption, but it is legendary and thats kinda fun.
Im headed back out Wednesday night and wont be in Seattle til sometime after the first of the year. Its gonna be really quiet around the blog, watch twitter I guess, or come up and ride?